I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Randomize
