I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Is this like a preordered booty call?
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
