But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize