I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
