i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
