We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
