He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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