I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Randomize
