butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
