Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize