would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize