my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Randomize
