I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
