I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
