please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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