Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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