quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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