im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
