but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
