His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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