at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Randomize
