Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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