the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
