so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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