Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
