p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
