They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
