i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize