Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
So. Much. Porn.
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