we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
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