sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
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