I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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