And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
