hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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