she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
Just invented taco cereal.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
