This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Randomize
