Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Randomize
