don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Randomize
