Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
