hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
