You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
My vagina just recognized that song.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
Randomize
