Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
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