I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
