Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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