I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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