k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Semen is not good for contacts.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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