That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
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