So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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