STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
never play flip cup with pint glasses
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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