No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
