Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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