even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
